You're ugly and you smell...
But alcohol does the job better
Which is why monkeys don't drive Ferraris
We all know you are gay!
Nobody is perfect, except for me!
With age comes wisom, but also a lack of time...
Yoo 'ave to speek like a sarf landaner geezer
A different birthday message
The old excuses are the best...
Nobody likes suprises anyway, do they?
Terms and conditions apply...
They'll only waste it, so don't get too jealous!
Amateur dramatics alert!
Took me ages to pick it!
Start of with a sortof compliment, and then get the with the sucker punch
Welcome to the Teeny Tiny World
Happy Birthday Poo Face!
All together now!
Say what you see - that's what Roy Walker would say!
Get rid of that wrinkleage
Ten dollar mister
The Popular Toasted Collection
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